Learning to Trust Yourself
Contributed by Andrew Love
A very important aspect in developing integrity is the process of rebuilding faith and trust in yourself. When you are out of integrity, when you can’t keep promises, when you can’t make good on your word—it’s very easy to start to feel increasingly smaller and lose the power we once had.
So in order to reverse this process, we need to reestablish our own sense of value by lifting up our ability to fulfill the promises that we commit to within our own minds and hearts. For some of you, this may sound like an easy task. And for others, it may seem impossible. But I guarantee you this foundational approach will make or break the long term success of your sexual integrity and your life in general.
Your Word has a value and that value is determined by your ability to live up to what you say.
When you apply this to your relationship with others, you can start by asking friends and family whether they sincerely believe you when you say you’re going to do something.
When you are a man or a woman of your word, then what you say lands more deeply in the minds of others and they take what you say to heart. But if you have a habit of over promising and under delivering, then you will find that very few people are able to really deeply trust you.
When we apply this to ourselves, it is all the more true because we are our own harshest critic, without fail. So if we’ve been failing to wake up on when our alarm clock demands of us, then the next time we set our alarm for early in the morning, deep down our subconscious mind really doesn’t have much faith that you are able to fulfill on this desired outcome.
If we really reflect on it, we will be able to see the areas of our life where we haven’t been able to keep our own word. This could include physical health and going to the gym, it could be with our spiritual well being by how much we are praying and reading scriptures and taking care of our spirit.
With sexual integrity it is blazingly apparent when you wake up and decide “I am not going to watch pornography” and yet somehow you end up in front of your computer or phone watching the very thing you promised yourself you wouldn’t touch.
So if your ultimate goal is sexual integrity, It might be too hefty a feat to achieve that right away. A much better strategy is to increase the levels of integrity that you can establish within your own heart, mind, and actions and expand from there.
Such a little thing as what time you go to bed, what time you wake up, how you go to sleep, how you wake up, the foods you eat, the type of conversations you have, where your eyes take you…all of these things add up to a general experience of yourself and life.
So, let this be a challenge to you. Let these words pierce through your reluctance to take life more seriously. Challenge yourself to figure out which areas of your life you are lacking in integrity and a ramp them up little by little.
This is the best investment you can make because whether you are seeking after serious relationship, or you want to advance in your career, or you would like to be healthier in some way, shape or form – it all hinders on your ability to execute on your promises to deliver on your word.
Your word is your bond with your future.
Build the capacity to fulfill on your word and you will be guaranteed grow into a person whose word has value to yourself and others.