#152 – Standards vs. Ideals | Carina Cunningham

High Noon December 7, 2022

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Gretchen Rubin’s #1 New York Times Bestselling book, The Happiness Project, started with a question that she asked herself:

“What do I want from life, anyway? I want to be happy.”

We may have asked ourselves the same question at least a dozen times in our lives, often with different answers. But one factor that we can attribute to the absence of happiness is when our standards are disconnected or unaligned with our ideals.

To achieve a life of peace, joy, integrity, and clarity, it is important to distinguish and delineate between standards and ideals while also understanding how one feeds into the other.

When we are unable to distinguish between the two, we feel stressed and pressured to live a life that is not authentic to us. Think about it: do your standards reflect the person that you want to be in those areas that you’d be proud of being? Are your standards taking you closer to your ideals to live a life of harmony? If not, why are you settling? And how are you settling? What do you need to do to adjust your standards?

In the realm of relationships and marriage, always remember that sexual integrity is an active, lifelong pursuit of being in line with your ideals. Even into marriage, into old age, there’s always work to be done.

Listen to Episode 152 to learn more!

What’s the difference between a standard and ideal?
When is it worth compromising your standards? Is it even worth it?
Why is it important to have these standards?
The Blessed Couple Podcast
In line with your ideal and standards, how do you decide what is worth fighting for or not?
Without the ideals and purely focusing on just your standards, you’ll be left with shame or justification
Misalignment with ideals and standards and not being open to work on it will cause that contradiction inside yourself.
Avoid making goals out of stress and stop and recalibrate instead.

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Categories: Heavenly Intimacy, Help Others, HN Connect Free, HN Couples, HN Families, Podcasts, Sexual Integrity

Tags: area, Carina, compromise, connect, contradiction, day, dishes, easy, eat, feel, house, ideals, important, integrity, life, people, person, podcast, sexual, standards

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	Richard & Mari Curry have been Blessed in married since December 2005 and have four children. They love working together as a team and are passionate about caring for others, especially in the realm of marriage development. After Mari received her Masters of Divinity from Cheongshim Theological Seminary, she and Richard served as co-pastors in Florida. Since then, they moved to New Jersey and over the years have happily served in a variety of ministry roles from music to education. All the while, working together to serve the Blessed Marriage Project and now High Noon Couples. They were a part of the founding team in 2013 and have been a part of it ever since. They currently serve as the directors of Highnoon Couples. They love the Energize! Retreats because they help realize True Parent’s desire for healthy couples and reminds us of Heavenly Parent’s love and hope for us all! Contact Mari at: mari@edu.highnoon.org
	Crescentia & Leighton DeGoede have been Blessed in married since October 2010, and have three children. Crescentia is currently serving as the District Pastor of district 3 and local pastor of the Clifton Family Church. Previously Crescentia was the Director of the National Blessing and Family Ministry of FFWPU for six years. Both Leighton and Crescentia currently serve as Matching Supporters. Prioritizing their marriage, while juggling children, work, and community service has been an exciting challenge. But they continue to find that the more they invest in their marriage, the more they have to give in all areas of their lives. They love giving other couples the opportunity to infuse their marriages with love deposits through marriage enrichment programs.
	Christoph & Lena Yasutake have been Blessed in marriage since April 2002 and have three teenagers. They are both equally passionate about marriage education and helping blessed couples create happy and healthy families. The Energize! Retreats are one of their favorite ways to share this passion. They served in the Young Couples ministry for six years and are frequent guest speakers at Blessing Workshops.
	Kate Pugnoli has served as the Community Liaison and is also responsible for generating our monthly newsletter. A former journalist, she has a Masters of Religious Education from the Unification Theological Seminary where she took focused her studies on counseling courses. She has also had experience facilitating small groups. The mother of two sons, now Blessed in marriage, she lives in Tucson, AZ with her husband Simon Herbert. She is committed to working with the Blessed Marriage Project in hopes that marriage enrichment will be available to communities across the country and particularly to bring the Energize! Couples Retreat to as many couples as possible.

#152 – Standards vs. Ideals | Carina Cunningham

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